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Showing posts from January, 2022

Mindshift Needed

Attitude and mindset help determine how we experience life.  I thought I had the right mindset going into my assessments at the Cross Cancer Institute these last few days. To my surprise, I did not.  Back in 2018, coming off a traumatic diagnosis and a painful hospital stay, entering the Cross symbolized a turning point. Things were going to get better. I had a chance of returning to a new normal that would be good. And that is exactly what unfolded.  Almost three years of remission were a treasure, even if the Covid virus altered how we could live them. This time, walking through the doors of that place where life and death live side be side, where healing and heartache sit in the same waiting room, it was not the same. I did not want to be there. It did not occupy a space of hope in my brain (yet). I was a "well" person entering into the land of the unwell. I was once again adding the words "cancer patient" to my identity descriptors. I didn't want to be a pat...

The Trouble With Remissions...

The trouble with cancer remissions is that its easy for the writers and readers to ignore a blog started when the disease was active...* The trouble with remissions is that you can begin to dream that you are cured... The trouble with remissions is that you can go back to the default posture of every human, the posture of forgetfulness. Forgetting that you are not your own but belong body and soul, in life and in death to a faithful Saviour. Forgetting how God has never left you from the moment of diagnosis, through chemotherapies and vertebroplasties and a stem cell transplant. Forgetting that in fact God has never forsaken you from the moment you were in your mother's womb... The trouble with remissions is that they END... My remission has ended and the cancer is once again it's aggressive, life-sucking self. Next week we hope to begin a new (experimental) treatment at the Cross Cancer Institute. Our hope is to achieve another of those troublesome remissions by summer. Pray t...