I don’t want to be melodramatic, but living with a terminal cancer seems a bit like sleeping in a tent in bear country. A twig snaps. A shadow falls across the tent wall. Squirrels chatter nervously. You are sure you hear low grunts. All of this has you certain that breakfast will be soon and that you are on the menu. (Who knew that the guy in the next campsite was a gifted snorer?) This is not a lament. Make no mistake, I am doing quite well as I finish off chemo cycle 12 (8 treatment cycles and 4 maintenance cycles) since my relapse in the new year. Still, it is hard for me not to interpret increasing aches and pains, variable energy levels and especially recent blood test results through a lens that makes me wonder if the “good days” are waning. Those blood tests have trended in the wrong direction, forming a lens that has this transition from summer to fall couched in questions: Is this it? Are we running out of treatment options? Was this my last good summer? Will I be able to
Brian’s diagnosis of Multiple Myeloma was in May 2018. The initial treatment was a stem cell transplant. After 30 months there was a relapse, followed by chemo, another relapse, new chemo and yet another relapse. In January 2024, the 4th treatment began. Brian currently gets weekly injections of an immunotherapy drug. Sometimes we keep the faith and sometimes we need family and friends around us to keep the faith for us. This blog is about enabling us all to be kept in the faith.